“I was brought up on classical literature, particularly of the 19th century European authors, with their high ideals and strict morals. Add to this an idealistic Soviet society, where grand schemes of future universal happiness were more important than the life of a single individual, and you will get someone with a serious martyr complex.
A lot of us justly believe that it is noble to sacrifice yourself to something much bigger and more important that your own life.”
“Becoming Flawesome”, Kristina Mand-Lakhiani
I recently came upon this quote and it resonated with me a lot. I grew up reading classical literature. I LOVE their high ideals and strict morals. I find them fascinating. I read Russian literature as well – Romanian culture was greatly influenced by it. It all does make you think great ideas are what matters. Sacrifice, hard work for an ideal is what it takes to be successful.
It all just goes to show how important literature is, how much it influences your life without you even knowing it, without you understanding it at the time. You are a product of what you read and you don’t even know it.
All this is to say… I read an interesting book these days – “Becoming Flawesome” by Kristina Mand-Lakhiani and you should definitely read it too!
I wrote here about some of the most important ideas I gathered from it.
This is a personal development kind of book, but I resonated with it nonetheless. Many of its lessons are drawn from the author’s interactions with her children. It is something I found recently as well: I learned so much from my kid!
Reading with a Purpose
Apart from that, I feel this is the kind of book you love or hate. You may hate it if you search for very specific solutions but you’re not ready for real introspection.
However, if you are willing to go all in open-minded, and really work through the questions and exercises at the end of each chapter, you will find a lot of surprising things about yourself. They may actually get you some insights into your life and purpose because, in the end, there are no solutions that fit everyone. You must come up with your own.
Kristina Mand talks a lot about personal experiences and events which gives the book authenticity and helps in understanding where and why particular questions are important to reflect upon.
A Different Perspective
What also impressed me were the insights Kristina had viewing Western societies as opposed to Eastern ones. She was brought up at a time when Estonia was part of the U.S.S.R. Naturally not only she had distorted views about the West, but her values focused on the group’s/country’s good as opposed to the individual’s happiness.
The process of changing her own understanding of what happiness meant for her was enlightening for me as well.
There is no universal recipe for happiness and finding your own needs lots of introspection. It’s difficult to be truly happy without understanding yourself and your values. The exercises in this book help with that.
What to Expect
This book is abundant with ideas of self-acceptance, self-love and authenticity. If you are dissatisfied with your life in any way, the path to fixing it lies within yourself. No one can find it for you. You may get a guide — perhaps a therapist along with books —but none of it can do the work in your place. You might as well stop searching for perfection and start living.
Conclusion
If you are in need of feel-good, understand and love yourself as you are ideas, look no further. Kristina Mand-Lakhiani manages to incorporate all that seamlessly into a book designed to help you find your authentic voice.
You can find the book here:
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